FANDOM


A cop calls Deputy Martin
Telephone ringing twn

Category

Prank Call

Prank Caller

TheGoldenPhone2

Soundboard(s) used

Deputy Martin
Sgt. Fields
Young Redneck

Victim(s)

Police

Length

5:00

A cop calls Deputy Martin is a soundboard prank call made by TheGoldenPhone in August 2010.

Transcript

Call #1

Young Redneck: Hello?
Cop: This is the [censored] police department. Um, this is [censored]-5075?
Young Redneck: What?
Cop: This is the [censored] police department. Have I reached [censored]-5075?
Young Redneck: Hey, what number ya calling, you dumb son of a bitch? You got the wrong number, ya dumb cocksucker!
Cop: Ok, sir have I reached [censored]-5075?
Young Redneck: I got your phone number right here on my cellphone, dude, you want me to call the police?
Cop: (surprised) Sir, this IS the police. This is the [censored] police.
Deputy Martin: Oh, I'm fine. This is...Officer Martin from the sheriff's department. How can I help you this evening?
Cop: Which sheriff's department are you with sir?
Deputy Martin: Big Daddy's Pizza.
Cop: You're with Big Daddy's Pizza sheriff's department?
Deputy Martin: Hey come right here, I'll be right here!
Cop: Ok, sir. Are you, are you with a law enforcement agency?
Deputy Martin: Yeah.
Cop: Which agency?
Deputy Martin: Big Daddy's Pizza.
Cop: (sighs) Ok, sir. I have a young lady on one of our phones that's making a harrassing communication report against you makin' these calls. You should go ahead and STOP making these calls to the number you've been calling. You understand?
Deputy Martin: No one's called ya'! There's nobody callin' ya.
Cop: Do you understand that sir?
Deputy Martin: No.
Cop: Ok, I'm gonna disconnect and make the police report. Thank you, sir.
Deputy Martin: Who is this?
Cop: [*hangs up*]

Call #2 (final)

[*phone rings*]
Police dispatcher: Police communications, [censored].
Deputy Martin: This is the Sheriff's Office, This is Deputy Martin from the Sheriff's Department.
Police dispatcher: Ok, you callin' us back?
Deputy Martin: Yeah.
Cop: [unintelligible]..just one second.
Deputy Martin: Ok.
Cop: Communication [censored].
Deputy Martin: Who is this?
Cop: Hello? Sir?
Deputy Martin: I'm Deputy Martin from the Sheriff's Department. Are you...are you calling here?
Cop: Ok, I'm tryin' to reach a subject whose been making a phone call from 50[censored]-5075
Deputy Martin: No one's called ya'!
Cop: Ok, and which department are you with, sir?
Deputy Martin: Big Daddy's Pizza.
Cop: Ok, let me tell you right now if you're NOT with the sheriff's department, and you say you are, you can go to JAIL.
Deputy Martin: Really?
Cop: Copy that? Ok.
Deputy Martin: No.
Cop: Don't call that young lady back and don't call HERE again.
Deputy Martin: There's nobody callin' ya. (slight pause) Alright?
Cop: Ok, I .. I'm really tryin' to figure out what's wrong with you, sir, to be honest with ya'. I mean are ya' intoxicated or what, what, what..[unintelligible]
Deputy Martin: Yeah, I hear you!
Cop: ..you're not makin' any sense.
Deputy Martin: Ok.
[*police radio traffic in background*]
Deputy Martin: I'm gonna advise you now, this is the sheriff's department.
Cop: (scoffs) WHICH sheriff's department?
Deputy Martin: I'm here at Big Daddy's Pizza.
Cop: You're the Mayor of Big Daddy's Pizza?
Deputy Martin: Yeah.
Cop: (starts laughing) Wha...ok. Well, what sheriff's dep- what city is that in?
Deputy Martin: Hey come right here, I'll be right here!
Cop: Well, I-I don't know where "here" is.
Deputy Martin: Who is this?
Cop: I'll tell you what...why don't you tell us where you're at and we'll have an officer MEET you.
Deputy Martin: No.
Cop: You don't wanna do that?
Deputy Martin: No.
Cop: No? (starts laughing)
Deputy Martin: Who is this?
Cop: I don't blame ya'! I wouldn't-
Deputy Martin: Huh? Who is this?
Cop: ..because you called this young lady, someone did, and said you were with the sheriff's department. And the REASON I called you is that the sheriff's department that's tryin' to reach this young lady, we were tryin' to find out if we could assist, you're OBVIOUSLY NOT with the sheriff's department..[unintelligible]
Sergeant Fields: Yeah right now you're talking to a police officer standing-!
Cop: [unintelligible]..and I'm not sure what's wrong with ya'.
Sergeant Fields: Do what? (pause) Yeah right now you're talking to a police officer standing inside this room! You're calling this lady in MY city and scaring her half to death.
Cop: (long pause) ...hello?
Sergeant Fields: What's your name?
Cop: Uh, are you talkin' to ME or sombody else?
Sergeant Fields: I don't know WHO I'm talking to or WHAT I'm talking to but, frankly, I don't care! You've got this lady scared to death in her own home because you're callin' threatening to blow her head off with an AR-15!
Cop: Wha...(starts laughing)..well, ok, uh...is there anything we can do to be of any service to you?
Sergeant Fields: Well, these people have not called you once!
Cop: Ok, and you're the Mayor of Big Daddy's Pizza?
Sergeant Fields: I'm located at [censored], Missouri.
Cop: [Censored], Missouri?
Sergeant Fields: No, I work for the police department. Call the police department.
Cop: You work for the police- which police department?
Sergeant Fields: I TOLD you the name of the police department for you to call.
Cop: You-your police department is called "Big Daddy's Police Department"?
Sergeant Fields: Look it up on your little computer, on the internet, and look up the [censored] police department.
Cop: (long pause) Ok, and you work for the [censored], Missouri police department?
Sergeant Fields: Sergeant [censored] Fields.
Cop: Sergeant [censored]?
Sergeant Fields: Yeah.
Cop: And what's your badge number and employee number, sir?
Sergeant Fields: Don't call this number again!
Cop: What-
Sergeant Fields: [*hangs up*]

[End of call]

References