FANDOM


Burger King Harassment Prank Call Part 5
Telephone ringing twn

Category

Celebrity Prank Call

Prank Caller

AntiVenom9808

Soundboard(s) used

Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chinaman, Kelsey Grammer

Victim

Lally

Length

7:43

Arnold, The Chinaman and Kelsey Grammer team up prank call a perverted Indian who comes out of the closet to Arnold.

TranscriptEdit

Call #1

[*phone rings*]
Female victim: Hello?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Howdy stranger.
[*high-pitched sound in background*]
Arnold Schwarzenegger: How are you?
Lally: Hello?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: How are you?
Lally: Good.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I would like to talk to you about Thomas Aquinas.
Lally: About what?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Thomas Aquinas.
Lally: Who's this?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I'm Detective John Kimble!
Lally: I don't know you.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Hey, I'm a police officer.
Lally: I don't care man. Don't call here again.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Why not?
Lally: 'Cause that stuff ... stupid things you're doing.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Negative.
Lally: Trying to make a prank call here? That's not, here, how we work.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: C'mon, don't bullshit me.
Lally: [unintelligible]
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Don't be ridiculous.
Lally: Don't call here.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Now listen to me very carefully ...
Lally: Oh ok, bye then.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: One of us is in ... deep trouble.
Lally: [unintelligible] John zero-zero... John zero whatever. I don't care.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: STOP IT! Stop whining!
Lally: Shut up. Ok, goodbye. [*hangs up*]
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You lack discipline!

Call #2

[*phone rings*]
Female victim: Hello?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Fuck you asshole.
Lally: FUCK YOU, bitch!
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Who are you?
Lally: You're a bitch. [pause] Hello?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: C'mon, don't bullshit me. You son of a bitch.
Lally: You son of bitch. Your mother.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Go and kiss ... your mother's ... behind.
Lally: Why you calling me? Bitch. Fuckin' bitch.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You're damaged goods lady.
Lally: You wanna' die? You wanna' die?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Give me your address there.
Lally: You, you're a police officer, right?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Yeah.
Lally: Yeah. Suck my dick.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You're really inconsiderate.
Lally: Suck my dick then.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: BULLSHIT!
Lally: What? [pause] Fuckin' bitch.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Fuck you.
Lally: Don't call here.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You must be very proud of yourself.
Lally: [unintelligible]
Arnold Schwarzenegger: It's showtime.
Lally: Who do you think you are?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I'm Detective John Kimble!
Lally: John ... Kimble?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Yeah.
Lally: I don't know you.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Stop whining!
Lally: I don't know you then.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Impersonating an officer, resisting arrest, fraud, reckless driving, and LYING to the sheriff.
Lally: I don't have a license so-
Arnold Schwarzenegger: It has to end here.
Lally: [unintelligible] years old, plus, I never fight. I came from India like, uh, two months ago ...
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You idiot!
Lally: Yeah, you dumbass.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You want to fuck with me?!
Lally: Yeah. I wanna' have sex with you. You want it? You want to sex with me?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: No.
Lally: Do it. I wanna. Alright?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Sue me, dickhead.
Lally: I'm gay. Can you give it to me? (whispers)
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Chill out, dickwad.
Lally: Please, please.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: So, SHUT UP!
Lally: Please.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Take it back!
Lally: Please!
Arnold Schwarzenegger: No deal.
Lally: Deal?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: No.
Lally: Make a deal. Please?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Negative.
Lally: Oh well. That's a good day to you. [pause] We can annoy each other on the bed.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Wrong.
Lally: Come on. Please?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: STOP IT! [pause] Could I speak to the drug dealer of the house please?
Lally: Who?!
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You give me the names of your drug suppliers and distributors and I'll tell the judge what a nice cooperative killer you are.
Lally: I'm living in Surrey. Come to my house and we can sleep together ... one night?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Tell me the truth. You owe me that much.
Lally: Huh? Ok, bye.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Fuck you.
Lally: Suck my dick.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Go on.
Lally: Yeah fuck me.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: That's one of my mission parameters.
Lally: Good fuck me. Fuck me.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You son of a bitch.
Lally: I am.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Well I've got news for you because you are MINE now. You belong to me!
Lally: Yeah, I am. Because I'm gonna' sleep with you, right? That's why I'm here.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I don't like you using foul language.
Lally: Foul language?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Yeah.
Lally: That's what, yeah, well I come from India. That's why. I can't pron-I can't speak proper english.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You said it yourself.
Lally: I-I said it my-myself.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: You want names and addresses?
Lally: Yeah.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Are you out of your mind?!
Lally: No. Well, yeah, kind of because ... I love you.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I work alone.
Lally: Ohh ... you love me?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: No.
Lally: Why not?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: This man is totally insane. [pause] It has to end here.
Lally: What you doing now?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I'm hungry.
Lally: You want to, um, eat my shit?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Fuck you.
Lally: [*hangs up*]

Call #3

[*phone rings*]
Lally: Good evening. May I help you?
Chinaman: Hello.
[*A female employee picks up the phone*]
Female victim: Hello?
Chinaman: Hello?
Lally: Hello?
[*Female employee hangs up*]
Chinaman: Yes?
Lally: Who's this?
Chinaman: I am a doctah.
Lally: Who?!
Chinaman: What's the name? How you spell?
Lally: [talking to someone in the background] ... another prank call.
Chinaman: How you spell?
Lally: R-O-S-W-I-N-C-K-O.
Chinaman: You need some help?
Lally: What?
Chinaman: Can you please say again?
Lally: R-O-N-S-U-
Chinaman: Who are you looking for?
Lally: What?
Chinaman: Who are you looking for?
Lally: I'm looking for?
Chinaman: Yes?
Lally: What's your name?
Chinaman: Doctal.
Lally: Abtar?
Chinaman: Yes.
Lally: Oh. Wh-why did you call here then?
Chinaman: An' what the last name?
Lally: Mine?
Chinaman: Yes.
Lally: It's Lally. L-A-L-L-Y.
Chinaman: Can you spell the name for me? Can you spell the name?
Lally: L-A-L-L-Y.
Chinaman: Huh?
Lally: L-A-L-L-Y.
Chinaman: Can you plase say again?
Lally: (speaks more slowly) L-A-L-L-Y.
Chinaman: I don't understand what you say. Can you please say again?
Lally: (speaks even more slowly) L-A-L-L-Y.
Chinaman: Huh? You need some help?
Lally: P-U-S-S-Y.
Chinaman: Why, wh-why you say muddafuck? Why you say?
Lally: Fuck off. Don't call here.
Chinaman: I call the bohrise?
Lally: You're police?
Chinaman: I call the bohrise?! The bohrise? I call the bohrise?! The bohrise?! [pause] The bohrise will come here to see you.
Lally: When?
Chinaman: The borise will get you in the yail.
Lally: When do the police come to see me?
Chinaman: Motherfucktal.
Lally: Farktar?
Chinaman: The bohrise will come here to fuck you.
Lally: Do it. I want you to.
Chinaman: The borise will get you in the yail.
Lally: Sure. I've already been there, like, three times. I love to do [unintelligible] jail.
Chinaman: The borise will fuck you in the yail.
Lally: I LOVE to do that.
Chinaman: How you spell?
Lally: Spell what?
Chinaman: Fucktal.
Lally:[*hangs up*]

Call #4 (final)

[*phone rings*]
Lally: Hello, Burger King.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Hello?
Lally: Hello?
Dr. Frasier Crane: This is Dr. Frasier Crane.
Lally: Oh, a police officer? How are you?
Dr. Frasier Crane: I think we have some issues to discuss.
Lally: Yeah, I know.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Your time has come.
Lally: [unintelligible]
Dr. Frasier Crane: Maybe it's time you start looking at different kinds of men. You know, men who are more settled. A little less flash and more substance.
Lally: Yeah...
Dr. Frasier Crane: Don't change the subject. Tell me what you think.
Lally: I think...I wanna' have sex with you.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Perhaps it would help to know that you're not alone.
Lally: When you are- I'm gonna' be along to your house...with you. And I [unintelligible]
Dr. Frasier Crane: Well do you want me to answer as a friend or a therapist?
Lally: Huh?
Dr. Frasier Crane: You just made that up, didn't you?
Lally: What?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Considering you learned to cook in England, it's a wonder I can tell your frank steak from a glazed tennis ball.
Lally: I ... don't know how to speak english. Sorry.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Try as you will, you're not going to turn me into some sort of a nervous wreck.
Lally: You wanna' suck my dick?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Well, let's just start with name-calling and see where it goes.
Lally: [unintelligible] Did you hear that? Does your mother suck dick?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Yes! I see.
Lally: You know what "fudi" means? Hello?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Yes, I am here. But you know, I'm sorry, I'm in the middle of a speach right now so you'll have to hold!
Lally: No, do you know what "fudi" means? Fudi means is a pussy.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Coo-coo ca-choo Mrs. Robinson!
Lally: [unintelligible] your Mom. I'll teach you punjabi, man. Come on. I'll teach you punjabi. You want to learn punjabi?
Dr. Frasier Crane: I'd love to.
Lally: [starts speaking punjabi]
Dr. Frasier Crane: I'd sooner attend a hoe-down.
Lally: You, uh, you want to learn punjabi?
Dr. Frasier Crane: No.
Lally: Why not?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Oh dear God.
Lally: You scared? You fuckin' son of bitch.
Dr. Frasier Crane: No.
Lally: Why you calling here then? Fuckin' bitch.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Don't change the subject. Tell me what you think.
Lally: I think ... you are gay. Like me. You want have sex with me. That's why you call me and keep calling me again and again.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Don't be ridiculous!
Lally: I love to do that.
Dr. Frasier Crane: I have my reputation to think of!
Lally: [unintelligible] what number? Well, give me your number. I'll call you as soon as I get out of work.
Dr. Frasier Crane: THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!!
Lally: Fuckin' bitch. [starts speaking punjabi] You call me then, fuckin' bitch.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Let's keep the details on a "need-to-know" basis.
Lally: It's like two minutes to go. I can leave your number now.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Are you through?
[*sound of a door closing*]
Lally: [talking to someone in the background]
[*hands the phone to a female employee*]
Female victim: Hello?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Oh, hello there.
Female victim: Yah?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Hello, this is Frasier Crane.
Female victim: [unintelligible] [*hangs up*]

[End of call]

ReferencesEdit

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.