|East Texas Hillbilly|
Traditional depiction of the East Texas Hillbilly
Prank Call Victim
Retired, possibly works on an oil rig
c. 1945 (age 69–70)
The East Texas Hillbilly (real name: Josh Lumpkin), is a prank call victim, discovered by CommandoRunningMan in December, 2012. A short-tempered, elderly man residing in East Texas, he quickly lost patience during his first call with Redneck Roofer. The East Texas Hillbilly apparently was watching his 8-year-old grandaughter (who could be heard joining in with her grandfather (at the end of the call)). He has been subsequently called with Stilwell Grandma, John Wayne, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Duncan.
In the Frank Garrett call, CommandoRunningMan led the victim to believe he was talking to an acquaintance, named Steve, threatening to "slap [him] in the face with my pecker" the next time he saw Steve on the rig.
The calls to the East Texas Hillbilly rank as some of the longest in the history of the medium. He will not simply hang up the phone, and often he will listen, or cuss at the caller, even with the knowledge that he is being pranked and/or recorded. In one notable call, the East Texas Hillbilly went into a session of sexual-innuendo with the Springfield Pervert for nearly fifteen minutes.
A recent call made by OsibePranks17, PranksAreUs83 and TheSBAddict on March 2, 2014, reveals the East Texas Hillbilly is aware of prank-callers MistahBlonde, ItsOnlyAPrank and Wilford Brimley (prank caller). The following day, PrankingBad, Harassment Caller and PranksAreUs84 discovered he had disconnected his phone-number, though there is a possibility that OsibePranks may have his new phone-number, since he kept daring the pranksters to dial a bleeped number.
OsibePranks17 gave the bleeped number to PranksAreUs83, Harassment CALLER, Pranktz, DaeHkiD, and JPranker98. The number was called (but un-recorded) and it appears that the number does not belong to the East Texas Hillbilly. It is speculated that it is the number of a friend or possible police officer/detective, as the person answering mentioned all the prank callers he knew, and denied all questions regarding Josh.
- "My daughter's here she's 8, she didn't make no prank calls."
- "I bet I can flip ya' and dick ya' before you can throw me and blow me!"
- "You got a warrant out for your arrest for illegal dick suckin' ... in a parking lot? Huh?!"
- I fuckin like to shoot niggers, motherfucker. If there was a nigger that got shot in Texarkana on a weekend more than likely it was me back in the sixties.
- "I'm 67-years-old! I'm a KOREAN veteran!!"
- "I killed ... slopes!"
- "I .. I'm a veteran. I didn't watch my buddies die face down in the mud to listen to people like YEW."
- "Gimme that phone! Get off of it. It's a .. this is an adult conversation." (to his granddaughter attempting listen in on the call)
- "You quit that language, QUIT IT!"
- "Do you know why birds fly upside down in Oklahoma? 'Cause it ain't worth shitting on!"
- "I'm a doctor of fucking insanity and meaness."
- "I got somethin' for ya'."
- "I've been fightin' the government for over a year."
- "Why don't you come on over and git it?"
- "Why don't you suck a fart outta my ass!"
- "To HELL with ya!!"
- "Sounds like you've been in a rut Fred and when you stay in a rut long enough that rut turns into a GODDAMN GRAVE!"
- "I know, you are absolute proof that babies can be conceived from anal sex."
- "I'm a roughneck motherfucker. Only a roughneck can whoop another roughneck's ass.
- "Hell yeah. White Christmas. WHITE POWER!!! White Power!"
- "I'm a member of the totally zoned-out, fucked-up, motorcycle brotherhood."
- "I used to do repos for the Bandidos!"
- "You ever killed anyone, motherfucker?"
- "I live in a house, motherfucker, I bet you live in a trailer!"
- "Hi, Fred. Fuck you, Fred."
- "I don't call the law, motherfucker. I settle my problems!"
- "You're so stupid I bet you sit on the TV and watch the couch!"
- "I ain't no law caller! I don't talk to the Police, I don't got nothin' to do with 'em!
- "Niggers commit more crimes than humans."
- "I'm the only white motherfucker who can walk into the eighth ward of Houston, Texas."
- "If I drink a fifth of whiskey I'll fight any motherfucker around!"
- "You Trayvon Martin worshipping motherfucker!"
- "I'll shoot a motherfucker fast, quick and in a hurry!"
- "How about I put a pistol to your head and say live or fuckin' die!"
- "I'll hold you down and inject you with motor oil! How'd you like to die that way, motherfucker?"
- "I'll shoot you then drag you behind my fuckin' truck, just like they did in Jasper. Then go have me a bowl of Cheerios!"
- "When I was 13 and found out what pussy and gasoline was, I hit the road."
- "You won't shit right for a week, god damn it!"
- "You ought ot look into Jackson Smith, he'd love to hear from your ass. They got a cemetery in Louisiana. Good buddy of mine. I sold him a Tec 9 not long ago. I wouldn't be fucking with me, Fred."
- "I got a pair of Tony Lamas that would stomp a hole in your ass."
- "I was fucking that bitch the other night so hard, I came and it came out of her left nostril!"
- "Ever since I met my daughter,
- I've had trouble with my water.
- Hurts like hell everytime I take a piss.
- And it's plain to see,
- she gave me a case of that ol' VD.
- I'd be damned if I ever fuck that bitch...again!"
- Nigger in a woodpile. Run nigger, run.
- Kiss my lantern, kiss my gun.
- "Catshit, ratshit, dirty old twat.
- Sixty-nine douchebags tied in a knot.
- Cock-suck, mother-fuck, dick-lick too.
- I'm a fucking biker, who the fuck are you?
- I was born on a mountain, raised in a cave,
- a bike'n and a fuck'n is all I crave."
- "Me, your mother and a dirty whore,
- floatin' down a river on a shithouse door.
- I'm gonna tie my pecker to my leg, to my leg.
- I'm gonna tie my pecker to my LEGGGG!!!!"'
|December 22, 2012||Redneck Roofer calls an East Texas Hillbilly||CommandoRunningMan||East Texas Hillbilly||Original call.|||
|December 22, 2012||Stilwell Grandma calls the East Texas Hillbilly||CommandoRunningMan||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|December 22, 2012||John Wayne calls the East Texas Hillbilly||CommandoRunningMan||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|December 22, 2012||Arnold calls the East Texas Hillbilly||CommandoRunningMan||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|December 22, 2012||Duncan calls the East Texas Hillbilly||CommandoRunningMan||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|April 30, 2013||East Texas Hillbilly||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|May 8, 2013||Respected Gentleman calls East Texas Hillbilly||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|June 29, 2013||East Texas Hillbilly 2||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly||The prankster used his real voice to talk to the victim.|||
|August 15, 2013||Officer Powell calls East Texas Hillbilly||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|August 23, 2013||Original call to Douchey Magooche||Wilford Brimley||Douchey Magooche||Originally broadcast on Wilford Brimley LIVE 8/23.|||
|August 26, 2013||East Texas Hillbilly - Narcissism therapy||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|August 29, 2013||Satanic Racist sings to East Texas Hillbilly||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|September 10, 2013||How did yew select them to be yer goats?||Jack Inoff||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|September 12, 2013||East Texas Hillbilly is pissed off with LifeAlert™||SyntheticPranks|| East Texas Hillbilly|
|This was a conference call with LifeAlert.|||
|September 13, 2013||Bailbondsh, Springfeel, Deputy Slingblade & Mama's Boy call the East Texas Hillbilly||Wilford Brimley||East Texas Hillbilly||Originally broadcast on Wilford Brimley LIVE 9/13.|||
|September 14, 2013||Rick the Mullet Man, Birmingham Redneck, Tennessee Bounty Hunter, Bail Bondsman and East Texas Hillbilly calls himself||Wilford Brimley||East Texas Hillbilly||Originally broadcast on Wilford Brimley LIVE 9/14.|||
|September 19, 2013||RAGE - East Texas Hillbilly||SyntheticPranks||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|Feburary 1, 2014||Black Hitler And Friends Call The East Texas Hillbilly||PranksAreUs84||East Texas Hillbilly|||
|Feburary 2, 2014||Superbowl 2014 Special: The Prosecutor and Drunk Guy Call a Very Drunk East Texas Hillbilly||PranksAreUs84||East Texas Hillbilly||This was the only call where the victim was heavily intoxicated.|||
|Feburary 12, 2014||East Texas Hillbilly 3 Way Madness||OsibePranks17||East Texas Hillbilly||This was a 4 way call between the prankster, the victim, Bell Cab, and a La Pizza Loca.|||
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Redneck roofer calls an east texas hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 Stilwell grandma calls the east texas hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ 3.0 3.1 John wayne calls the east texas hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ 4.0 4.1 Arnold calls the east texas hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ 5.0 5.1 Duncan calls the east texas hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ 7.0 7.1 Respected Gentleman calls East Texas Hillbilly Part 1 on YouTube
- ↑ Respected Gentleman calls East Texas Hillbilly part 2 on YouTube
- ↑ East Texas Hillbilly 2 on YouTube
- ↑ Officer Powell calls East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ Douchey Magooche on YouTube
- ↑ East Texas Hillbilly - Narcissism therapy on YouTube
- ↑ Satanic Racist sings to East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ How did yew select them to be yer goats on YouTube
- ↑ East Texas Hillbilly is pissed off with LifeAlert™ on YouTube
- ↑ East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ Rick the Mullet Man, Birmingham Redneck, Tennessee Bounty Hunter, Bail Bondsman and East Texas Hillbilly calls himself on YouTube
- ↑ RAGE - East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ Black Hitler And Friends Call The East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ Superbowl 2014 Special: The Prosecutor and Drunk Guy Call a Very Drunk East Texas Hillbilly on YouTube
- ↑ East Texas Hillbilly 3 Way Madness on YouTube