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George Takei calls a deli

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George Takei calls a deli
Telephone ringing twn

Category

Prank Call

Prank Caller

Richard and Sal

Soundboard(s) used

George Takei

Victim(s)

Deli owner

Length

2:25

More Richard and Sal prank call nonsense...

TranscriptEdit

Call #1

Deli owner: Ham N' Egg. Can I help you?
Son: Hello deli?
Deli owner: Yeah?
[*children talking in the background*]
Son: My Dad would like to make an order.
Deli owner: Ok...
[*Deli owner speaks another language in the background*]
Son: Haji?
Deli owner: (quickly) Give me a second.
[*Deli owner continues speaking to someone in the background*]
Son: Yeah, well can we cut the bullshit and get some food? C'mon.
Deli owner: Ok! Nah-no more bullshit. (embarassed) I was helping somebody out before you talking.
Son: Yeah, but you know, we're trying to make an order here.
Deli owner: Ok. Now you have to make an order. What's wrong with you? You alright?
Son: Ok, hold on. Moishe, are you there?
Moishe: Yeah, I'm here.
Son: Put daddy on the phone.
Moishe: Daddy's gonna order, ok? Here he is.
"Daddy": *clears throat*
Deli owner: Hello?
"Daddy": *clears throat*
Deli owner: Yes?
"Daddy": *clears throat*
Deli owner: ...
"Daddy": *clears throat*
[*Everyone in the studio laughs*]
"Daddy": *clears throat* Could you get me some hot water?
Deli owner: Hot water?
"Daddy": Hot.
Deli owner: Hot water? Ohh ... yeah I got hot water. You want hot water?
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat* FUCK! (pause) Could you get me some hot water?
Deli owner: God damn it, you gotta' be makin' .. what? [*hangs up*]

Call #2

[*phone rings*]
Deli owner: Hello?
"Daddy": Could you get me some hot water?
Deli owner: Papa, I no play. You got time for play, thank you, but get the hell out of my phone. Please?
"Daddy": FUCK!
Deli owner: [*hangs up*]

Call #3

[*phone rings*]
Deli owner: Hello Ham N' Egg.
Son: Sir, my Dad's trying to make an order.
Deli owner: But he say "hot water". What the hell is that?
Son: He has Tourettes.
Deli owner: Go ahead, tell me. "Hot water" what?
"Daddy": *clears throat* Dry oatmeal.
Deli owner: Dry oatmeal?
"Daddy": FUCK! Dry oatmeal.
Deli owner: Dry oatmeal. What else?
"Daddy": *clears throat* *clears throat*
Deli owner: Yes, you say dry oatmeal?
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK!
Deli owner: [*hangs up*]

Call #4

[*phone rings*]
Deli owner: Ham N' Egg. Can I help you?
"Daddy": *clears throat* Dry oatmeal.
Deli owner: Ok, one second.
"Daddy": FUCK!
Deli owner: (in the background) Yeah alright. I'm [unintelligible]
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat*
Howard Stern: (laughing in background) Its Tourettes.
[*Everyone in the studio laughs*]
Deli owner: Listen, I'm not playin' around. If you want something, let me know what you want.
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat*
Deli owner: [*hangs up*]
[*Everyone in the studio laughs*]

Call #5 (Final)

Deli owner: Hello?
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat*
Deli owner: Hello?
"Daddy": Dry oatmeal.
Deli owner: Uh, all- the only oatmeal I got is in the b-box because I no cook oat-
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK!
Deli owner: No, I think you got-
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat*
Deli owner: -the wrong number or some-
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat*
Deli owner: I'm no [unintelligible] or no deliveries-
"Daddy": *clears throat* FUCK! *clears throat*
Deli owner: And here's that little [unintelligible]
"Daddy": Dry oatmeal.
Deli owner: Fuuuck you. [*hangs up*]
[End of call]

ReferencesEdit

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