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John Wayne calls his Worst Nightmare

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John Wayne calls his Worst Nightmare
Telephone ringing twn

Category

Prank Call

Prank Caller

Ruen

Soundboard(s) used

John Wayne

Victim(s)

John Wayne's "Worst Nightmare" and his wife

Length

3:57

John Wayne is looking for Pierre Cordona, and calls a man at 4 AM who refers to himself as Wayne's "Worst Nightmare".

TranscriptEdit

Call #1
(phone rings)
Woman: Hello?
John Wayne: Thank you, I'm looking for a Pierre Cordona. He's staying here.
Woman: Wrong number.
Wayne: Pierre Cordona.
Woman: You have a wrong number.
Wayne: Cord McNally. Todd Jackson. But when it comes right down to it, don't matter to me.
Man: Hello?
Wayne: Now did you come here to give me a message or just to pass the time of day?
Man: Who the fuck are you? Do you know what time it is!?
Wayne: (partially talking over the man) I'm looking for a Pierre Cordona, he's staying here.
Man: Hey you gay motherfucker! Guess what?
Wayne: What's your name?
Man: My name is your worst fuckin' nightmare, asshole. It's 4:00 in the fuckin' morning! You call my fuckin' house again and I'll hunt you down and hurt you, you understand?
Wayne: I mean to kill you in one minute, or see you hanged in Fort Smith at Judge Parker's convenience! Which—
Man: (interrupting) You know what? Come on over, asshole!
Wayne: What is your name?
Man: My name is your worst fuckin' nightmare, did I tell you that once already or are you fuckin' stupid?
Wayne: Thank you, I'm looking for a Pierre Cordona, he's staying here.
Man: Yeah, pull up in my driveway, asshole! I haven't fired my gun in a week!
Wayne: Blue Tom, we've gt your friend Ketchum here. And there's a sawed-off shotgun with the triggers tied back right behind him!
Man: Call my house again, you goddamned gay faggot motherfucker!
Wayne: What is your name? What's your name?
(hangs up)

Call #2
(phone rings)
Woman: Hello?
Wayne: Thank you, I'm looking for a Pierre Cordona, he's staying here.
Man: You've got a wrong number, man.
Wayne: Jacob McCandles. Cord McNally.
Man: Who are you?
Wayne: Thank you, I'm looking for a Pierre Cordona, he's staying here.
Man: No, no no you've got a wrong number.
Wayne: Where's your brother?
Man: Pardon me?
Wayne: Where's your brother?
Man: I can't understand you, try again.
Wayne: When's the last time you saw Ned Pepper?
Man: I have no fuckin' idea what you're talking about, I do know that you're calling my house at 4:00 in the morning. Now you're calling my wife's cell phone at 4:00 in the morning, at least on the East Coast. You may be in another time zone, but I don't know what you're doing. I do know that you need some kind of help, and it's either help with alcohol, help with drugs, or help with the shit that lives between your ears, which is it?
Wayne: Yessir.
Man: Now go get yourself some help, stop dialing our fuckin' phone numbers, do you understan—
Wayne: (interrupting) Thank you, I'm looking for a Pierre Cordona, he's staying here.
Man: No no no no no. There's no such animal living around here with that fuckin' name.
Wayne: Are you the big chief, or one of the little Indians?
Man: Pardon me?
Wayne: Are you the big chief, or one of the little Indians?
Man: I'm your worst fuckin' nightmare! That's all you need to know about me, okay?
Wayne: Goddammit, Quincy! Where's your brother?
Man: Have you got the message yet, dude? You're dialing the wrong fuckin' number!
Wayne: Yessir.
Man: Okay. Knock it the fuck off, alright?
Wayne: Pierre Cordona.
Man: Yeah, I got your Pierre Cordonas, asshole.
Wayne: Now the last time I asked you that question you said "no," and you said it in a loud and clear voice.
Man: Yeah, and I'm saying "no" again!
Wayne: When's the last time you saw Ned Pepper?
Man: I don't know what the fuck you're talking about a Ned Pepper, I know it's 4:00 in the goddamn morning, I know if I could get my hands around your scrawny little fuckin' neck I'd do something with it, okay? Stop fuckin' calling here, asshole!
Wayne: (says something unintelligible due to attempting to talk over the man)
(hangs up)
(end of call)

External linksEdit

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