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John Wayne checks up on the Stilwell Grandma
Telephone ringing twn

Category

Prank Call

Prank Caller

CommandoRunningMan

Soundboard(s) used

John Wayne

Victim(s)

Stilwell Grandma

Length

3:37

A few days after his last call, John Wayne checks up on the Stilwell Grandma.

TranscriptEdit

Call #1

Stilwell Grandma: Hello?
John Wayne: Hello! This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: Ohhh, to hell it's John Wayne! John Wayne's DEAD you sorry son-of-a-bitch!! You git off my phone and damn you this time you STAY OFF OF THERE! WOOOOOOOOOOOOH! (takes quick breath) WOO! WOO!
John Wayne: What are you mumbling about?
Stilwell Grandma: (continues) WOO! WOOOOOOOOOH!
John Wayne: Aw go to hell. You yella-bellied chicken-livered-
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]

Call #2

[*phone rings*]
Stilwell Grandma: Hello?
John Wayne: We're goin' to Missouri.
Stilwell Grandma: No hell no I ain't goin' nowhere you sorry son-of-a-bitch. I want you .. SORRY BASTARDS to stay off my phone! WOOOOOOOOOOOOH! (takes quick breath)
John Wayne: Well I don't particularly care if you go to the school or not.
Stilwell Grandma: (continues) WOO! WOO!WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!
John Wayne: Some nights ago we lost three men. I haven't slept since and we haven't lost anymore men. We're not gonna lose another one tonight or from now on!
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]


Call #3

[*phone rings*]
Stilwell Grandma: Hello?
John Wayne: You ever see a buffalo?
Stilwell Grandma: OH YOU DIRTY SON-OF-A-BITCH! Don't you start none a yer bullshit with me. You get off my phone and you STAY OFF!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! WOO! WOO!
John Wayne: Oh shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: WOOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Oh shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOOOH.
John Wayne: Oh shut up.
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]


Call #4

[*phone rings*]
Stilwell Grandma: Hello?
John Wayne: Hello!
Stilwell Grandma: Well I SAID hello.
John Wayne: If I gave you a written order would you obey it?
Stilwell Grandma: What in the sam hill are you talkin' about? Huh?
John Wayne: This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: Aww, hell no! You ain't puttin' no John Wayne shit off on me. John Wayne is DEAD. And now you sorry son-of-a-bitch .. get off my phone and STAY OFF OF THERE! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOOOO!
John Wayne: Huh?
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]


Call #5

[*phone rings*]
Stilwell Grandma: Hello?
John Wayne: We're goin' to Missouri.
Stilwell Grandma: Hell no. No Missouri, no nothing, you sorry low-down dirty son-of-a-bitch. Get off my phone and shut your dirty filthy low-down mouth. Do you GIT IT you sorry low-down buzzard?
John Wayne: This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: WOOOOOOOOOOO!
John Wayne: This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: Go to Missouri on THAT you sorry son-of-a-bitch! WOOOOOOO!
John Wayne: This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]


Call #6

[*phone rings*]
John Wayne: Hello! This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: Ohh, you lying sorry son-of-a-bitch. You're not John Wayne you DOG- .. you're nothin' but a low-down bastard. Git off my phone! WOOOOOO!
John Wayne: You ever see a buffalo?
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: If I gave you a written order would you obay it?
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOOO-
John Wayne: Last night someone sneaked into the chuckwagon.
Stilwell Grandma: -OOOOOOOOOO! OOH! OOH! OOOOH!
John Wayne: Some nights ago we lost three men. I haven't slept since and we haven't lost anymore men. We're not gonna lose another one tonight or from now on!
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]


Call #7 (final)

[*phone rings*]
Stilwell Grandma: Hello?
John Wayne: This is John Wayne.
Stilwell Grandma: Nooo! You sorry low-down son-of-a-bitch! It's *NOT* John Wayne! You git that dirty low-down ass off my phone and keep your DAMN MOUTH shut! I'm sick and tired of this you low-down bastard. Do you GIT it? YOU GIT IT!? WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
John Wayne: We're goin' to Missouri.
Stilwell Grandma: [*hangs up*]

[End of call]

ReferencesEdit

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