Richard Simmons calls another Richard
Telephone ringing twn


Prank Call

Prank Caller


Soundboard(s) used

Richard Simmons


Richard's wife



Richard Simmons calls another man named Richard, who happens to be out, but the man's wife answers and Richard reveals his true fantasies about her husband.


Call #1

Richard's wife: Hello?
Richard Simmons: Well hello!
Richard's wife: Yeah?
Richard Simmons: Good morning. How are you?
Richard's wife: Pretty good, uh, good.
Richard Simmons: I want to talk to you about sausage.
Richard's wife: About what?
Richard Simmons: ...I'm so sorry.
Richard's wife: Who is this?
Richard Simmons: Hi. My name is Marilyn.
Richard's wife: Marilyn?
Richard Simmons: Yes! I want to talk to Richard.
Richard's wife: Richard's not here.
Richard Simmons: I love Richard's warm balls.
Richard's wife: Richard's not here right now. You want me to have him to call ya'?
Richard Simmons: Yes! Because I've hopped on hundreds of sausage. Richard's a giant at 7 inches and over 500 pounds.
Richard's wife: (gasps) Wha-who in the hell is this, anyway?
Richard Simmons: My name is Marilyn.
Richard's wife: What Richard are you talkin' about?
Richard Simmons: Richard was swollen. He sat on the sausage with me and told the audience how tough it is to milk my warm balls.
Richard's wife: [*hangs up*]

Call #2

[*phone rings*]
Richard's wife: Hello?
Richard Simmons: I know what its like to be swollen and hard, Richard.
Richard's wife: RICHARD is not here! I told you!
Richard Simmons: Oh my God!
Richard's wife: I don't want you callin' me anymore, ok?
Richard Simmons: Well that's YOUR problem!
Richard's wife: It IS my problem damn it if you keep callin' me.
Richard Simmons: My nuts, they get a little numb sometimes, and I get this tingling.
Richard's wife: It sounds like you're a fag.
Richard Simmons: My goodness!
Richard's wife: I'm getting angry.
Richard Simmons: Guess I'll just have to play with your nuts.
Richard's wife: You're not gonna' play with shit. You're gonna' be in jail.
Richard Simmons: I'll call back in an hour.
Richard's wife: Quit callin' here! [*hangs up*]
Richard Simmons: Richard, please! Help me milk my pickle!

Call #3 (Final)

[*phone rings*]
Richard's wife: Hello?
Richard Simmons: Please don't hang up the phone again.
Richard's wife: Well, I'M GONNA' HANG IT UP YA' QUEER! I'm hangin' up!
Richard Simmons: Oh my God!

[End of call]


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