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Rick Calls a Smoker
Telephone ringing twn

Category

Prank Call

Prank Caller

TheGoldenPhone2

Soundboard Used

Rick the Mullet Man, Duncan

Victim

Smoker

Length

4:21

The phone rings and the smoker answers it. He talks in a damaged sounding voice for the entire call as if he were somebody who's vocal cords were damaged.


Call #1
Smoker: "Hello."
Rick: "'Yello."
Smoker: "Hello."
Rick: "You called me sir, why-are-you calling here?"
Smoker: "I don't know what you're talking about."
Rick: "You've called here a dozen times."
Smoker: "You got the wrong number dude."
Rick: "I didn't call your house, I've been sitting here on the fucking, TV and computer, and all of a sudden you call here, "unavailable" with your number blocked."
Smoker: "What are you talking about."
Rick: "Nobody has called your house from this number."
Smoker: "Yeah well this is not my house."
Rick: "Yeah well nobody called there, the phone records will prove, no one called your house; (Indistinguishable) THOSE FUCKING CIGARETTES ARE GETTING TO YOU AIN'T IT YOU PRICK?!; Go smoke another, carton of Marlboros motherfucker!"
Smoker: "Hey you know what asshole? You're-you're out of your fucking mind, I don't know what you're talking about.
Rick: "Go smoke another Marlboro you motherfucker!"
Smoker: "Come on over I'll kick your ass cocksucker."
Rick: "I could come down there with my fuckin' AR-15 and shoot your fuckin' old Hoosier ass, right there in Independence, Missouri! NOW, CALL HERE AGAIN, MOTHERFUCKER, AND THAT'S JUST WHAT I'LL FUCKIN' DO, YOU COCKSUCKER!! FUCK YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!!!"
Smoker: "Ahhhhhhh, You're fucking crazy I love it. (Talking over Rick) I love it. :-)"
Rick: "Hey eat me you cocksucker."
Smoker: "You must be a democrat. ;-)"
Rick: "Fuck you I'm going to call-call the police and give them your fucking name."
Smoker: "Oh do that, please do."
Rick: "Do you want me to come Kansas, I'll come to Kansas right now, and I will fucking kill you, you got that you piece a' shit?"
Smoker: "You fucking idiot. You are a' Obama looking motherfucker ain't you?"
Rick: "Go smoke another Marlboro you motherfucker!"
Smoker: "Come come get it on asshole."
Rick: "You got nothin' ta' live for because everyday, when you wake up and look in the fuckin' mirror and see that toothless Deliverance Hoosier motherfucker, you got no reason ta' live."
Smoker: "I love it, you're fucking making my day and I'm laughing my ass off. I can't believe I get this much entertainment and no cover charge."
Rick: "(Rick laughs)..."I GOT YOUR FUCKING NAME AND YOUR ADDRESS, I GOT YOUR ZIP CODE YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT!"
Smoker: "Come on I love it."
Rick: "YOU'RE 4 HOURS & 12 MINUTES AWAY AND I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU YOU MOTHERFUCKER!"
Smoker: "Hey hey no I'm not 4 hours away."
Rick: "Go smoke another, carton of Marlboro's motherfucker!"
Smoker: "No when I, when I pull my dick out of your wife's ass, I'll stick it in yours."
Rick: "Yeah she does, she got em' from you you son of a bitch."
Smoker: "She likes it too."
Rick: "Why do you want trouble?"
Smoker: "I didn't call you, you called me asshole, you dummy."
Rick: "Nobody has called your house from this number; quit calling here okay; Why don't you put your unavailable off and I'll kick your fucking ass!"
Smoker: "Oh great come on, I like it."
Rick: "Are you a faggot?; You piece of fucking garbage!; Go smoke another Marlboro you motherfucker; (Rick interrupts the Smoker) Hey fuck you you Hoosier, go listen to your Garth Brooks records and drink another Budweiser!"
Smoker: "(Wheezing) I love it."
Rick: "You ever had your fuckin' ass kicked by a 40-year-old, you motherfucker?!"
Smoker: "Hey I'm surprised you made it to 40 your ignorant cocksucker. (wheezing)"
Rick: "Hey, eat me you cocksucker."
Smoker: "Naw, fuck it, I've had shit before, I don't like."
Rick: "(Indistinguishable) THOSE FUCKING CIGARETTES ARE GETTING TO YOU AIN'T IT YOU PRICK?!"
Smoker: "(Raspy breathing) Are we done now?"

Call #2:
Smoker: "Hello?"
Duncan: "Hello?"
Smoker: "Hello?"
Duncan: "I'm not even worried about it, you called me."
Smoker: "I'm sorry I did not call you."
Duncan: "The telephone just rang, and I answered it and it was you, explain that one to me."
Smoker: "I guess you're fucking drunk."
Duncan: "First of all, I haven't called you house."

Call #3:
Smoker: "Hello?"
Duncan: "What do you want, you silly son of a bitch you?"
Smoker: "You know what, you are making my day, does your mama still fuck niggers? You sound like Obama :-)"
Duncan: "Hey does your mama still got uh, worms crawlin' out of her pussy?"
Smoker: (Raspy laugh)

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