California Crook
California crooky
Common Depiction of the California Crook


Prank Call Victim, Victim Soundboard

The California Crook is a Palestinian-American bail-bondsman in California, who was discovered by The Phantom Caller in early 2016.[1] Known for having a short temper, and quick witted responses, often mocking at the prank callers race, and questioning their sexuality.

Due to his clever insults, infectious laugh, and unique accent he quickly became popular among the community. He has become a favorite among many prank calls.

The California Crook was quickly given his own soundboard, one in which he has been called several times with, and has failed to recognize his own voice.

As shown in more recent calls, he is shown to be fed up with the prank calls, and has threatened legal action against the prank callers in his usual obscene and profane manner.

As a result of the Crook's growing frustration with the prank calls, he often threatens to pursue legal action, despite the fact that he not only invites the callers to "keep calling," he also threatens them with violence, threatening to take their teeth out, hire people to catch the callers and fuck them, even going as far to make death threats to shoot them or cut their necks, and promising to bury them in his parking lot - ironically the Crook's reasoning for wanting to get police involved is due to threats, even though he himself has made them in almost every call.

Depiction Edit

California Crook is depicted by the likeness of Indian actor Anupam Kher. According to vague commentary from the blog which the depiction originates, it was taken of Kher as he openly insulted a speaker.

Criminal History Edit

After an investigation it was found that the California Crook had been arrested in 2005 suspected of diverting tens of millions of dollars to the Middle East, money they made through drug sales and hustling cons and jail inmates through intimidation and kidnapping. However it seemed that charges were exaggerated and now he operates normally his business.


  • ​Bailbonds, hello?
  • Suck your dick? you have a dick?!
  • ​Fred Herbert?
  • ​Where are you right now?
  • ​This is a business you fucking bitch.
  • ​One of these days I'm gonna catch you! One of these days I'm gonna catch you! I swear for God, for Jesus! I'm gonna knock your teeth out!
  • ​It look like you want to visit a cemetery very soon.
  • I have a dick for your mother, okay?
  • Go to Compton. Its sounds like you have itchy ass. Go to Compton and some nigger will grab you and fuck you.
  • If I catch you I'll fucking.... take your teeth out.
  • I'm not a gay.
  • I have a bullet with your name on it.
  • ​Give your address, where you are. I can take care of you.
  • ​Your ass itching you? You need someone to fuck you?
  • You motherfucking crook.
  • You fucking gay, man.
  • White piece of shit!
  • It sound to me you fucking... mentally ill.
  • It sound to me you have fucking... brain damage
  • Fuck me?


External LinksEdit