|Vladimir suck my ass|
Russian mobster, ex-KGB agent
Vladimir Kosack or Kosak (also known The Russian, Angry Russian, Russian Guy, Russian Mobster, Russian Spy and, less frequently, Valadimiri Kosak) is a prank call character voiced by an anonymous prank caller. The circumstances of the original call is unknown, however, a victim soundboard was created by Jib Jab and hosted by Soundboards.com on October 17, 2003. Several lines used by Kosack suggest the prank caller was influenced by Judge Judy ("Not only are you not a nice person ... but you are also a slob.") and Bill Lumburgh ("I'm going to have to, uh, kind of disagree with you there."), both popular soundboards at that time.
The Russian soundboard is one of the oldest in existance, however, it has seen very limited use and remains relatively unknown in the post-"Duncan-era" community. Despite this, it has achieved a small cult following among amateur soundboard prank callers. A soundboard prankster called "Valadimirkosak" was briefly active in 2008. In April of that year, a parody interview was created by VihalyProductions and posted to YouTube.
- "Hello. My name is Vladimir."
- "Do you have my money?"
- "My name is Vladimir ... Vladimir Kosack."
- "LISTEN to me."
- "Shut the FUCK up and listen to me."
- "Why don't you pay attention?"
- "Do you have my money yet?"
- "For the marijuana .. and the cocaine I sold you."
- "You ever get punched in the face for talking too much?"
- "I will kill you."
- "I will kill you. And then ... I will kill myself."
- "I got beat on, I got stripped butt-naked, and you did nothing."
- "That's not very nice."
- "Not only are you not a nice person ... but you are also a slob."
- "Get a life, you know, get a real job."
- "All I want to hear from your ASS is 'I'm sorry'."
- "Do you have someway ... to make money?
- "If you have to ask then you're not ready to know yet.
- "What did I just say?
- "You like dogs?"
- "You like .. cots?"
- "I HATE cots. They're all fuzzy and shit."
- "One time, I tie rock to cot. I put cot in lake. It sank to deh bottom."
- "What did you say?"
- "I .. can't understand you."
- "I could, uh, I could make those arrangements."
- "I can CALL Gibbons right now."
- "No, that is not right."
- "Yes, I .. think so."
- "Do you think so?"
- "Um ... ok."
- "Well I'm ... just not, uh, sure about that right now."
- "I'm going to have to, uh, kind of disagree with you there."
- "I LIKE you."
- "I always tell the truth ... even when I lie."
- "What is with the attitude? I sense this."
- "Who the hell are you?"
- "I am done talking to you!"
- "I was only kidding!"
- "What are you doing?"
- "How much did THAT cost?"
- "No! You know what? I've been calling you all god-damed day! Where the hell have you been?!"
- "Do you want a piece of me? Because I will cut you bitch."
- "I will drink my vodka. You tell story."
- "I myself, I uh drink Vodka. It's my favorite drink, you know. It's very, very much better than any kind of uh.. Coca-Cola you can get out there on the street."
- "You fucker! You .. FUCKING BITCH!"
- "I work for the KGB. Uh. A little bit of the Russian Mafia. Uh.. that's about what I do."
- "I say good day to you sir."
|N/A||Original Vladimir Kosack call||Vladimir Kosack||N/A||Original call is considered lost.|
|April 26, 2006||Russian soundboard prank call||WarMaggot||Male victim|||
|November 4, 2006||Russian Caller Prank||Flamesofeternity||Male victim|||
|2007||Prank Call to Qalingo Napartuk||Edua Jones||Male victim|||
|January 26, 2008||Russian Guy vs. Mexican||Blobperson||Male victim|||
|March 17, 2008||Russian vs. The Hardcore Kid (AKA: Return of the Russian)||Blobperson||Male victim|||
|May 7, 2008||Valadimir vs. Olof||Valadimirkosak||Male victim|||
|August 12, 2008||Omar's Russian Prank Call||Chikis300||Male victim|||
|December 29, 2008||Funny Russian Prank Call||Hudson Hall||Male victim|||
|January 29, 2009||PhonePrankster - VLADIMIR vs. ANDREW||PhonePrankster||Male victim|||
|February 18, 2009||Arnold, Jack Black, Forest Gump, and Russian Spy Call Alcoholics Anonymous||Disruction Lord||Alcoholics Anonymous|||
|May 18, 2009||Valadimiri Kosak prank calling and the other one calling FBI||Skoghall811||Male victim|||
|May 21, 2009||Valadimiri Kosak calling And a lady start to pray to god and jesus||Skoghall811||Male victim|||
|July 19, 2009||Russian Mobster Prank Call||Bengaz07||Male victim|||
|August 9, 2009||Duncan + Russian Guy prank calls||TBHPrankcalls||Female victim|||
|January 29, 2010||Prank calling 7-11 with the russian soundboard||Pats200||Male victim|||
|August 9, 2010||Prank Call #2 on Danny||JRodsVids||Male victim|||
|April 14, 2011||Vladimir Kosak meets Syed||Deividas J||Male victim|||
|January 23, 2012||Fun with Telemarketers, Episode 001: "John From the Alarm Company talks with Valadimir Kosak"||David Eckoff||Male victim|||
|March 14, 2013||Colby P. Prank Call||Trevor Martin||Female victim|||
- ↑ Vladimir Kosak on YouTube
- ↑ Russian soundboard prank call on YouTube
- ↑ Russian Caller Prank on YouTube
- ↑ Prank Call to Qalingo Napartuk on YouTube
- ↑ russian guy vs mexican (prank call) on YouTube
- ↑ Russian vs. The Hardcore Kid AKA:Return of the Russian(prank call) on YouTube
- ↑ Valadimir vs Olof on YouTube
- ↑ Omar's Russian Prank Call on YouTube
- ↑ Funny Russian Prank Call on YouTube
- ↑ PhonePrankster - VLADIMIR vs. ANDREW on YouTube
- ↑ Prank Call Arnold Jack Black Forest Gump and Russian Spy Call Alcohol Anonymous on YouTube
- ↑ Valadimiri Kosak prank calling and the other one calling FBI on YouTube
- ↑ Valadimiri Kosak calling And a lady start to pray to god and jesus on YouTube
- ↑ Russian Mobster Prank Call on YouTube
- ↑ duncan + russian guy prank calls on YouTube
- ↑ Prank calling 7-11 with the russian soundboard on YouTube
- ↑ Prank Call #2 on Danny on YouTube
- ↑ Vladimir Kosak meets Syed on YouTube
- ↑ Fun with Telemarketers, Episode 001: "John From the Alarm Company talks with Valadimir Kosak" on YouTube
- ↑ Colby P. Prank Call on YouTube